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From Wildthyme with Love was a novel written by Paul Magrs and released to coincide with the 50th anniversary of Doctor Who. The novel was written as a correspondence of 50 letters between Iris Wildthyme and Panda, each of them parodying at least one Doctor Who story. It contained a variety of references to Magrs' previous work, both for the Doctor Who franchise and independent of the Doctor Who franchise.

Publisher's summary[]

Panda lovey,

This is the last time I ever listen to you.

Bloody hell!

Plot[]

1[]

Iris Wildthyme finds herself on a dead planet having followed Panda's suggestion that it would be host to a "Bring-a-Bottle" party. Having made her way through the petrified forest she bangs on the door to the address that Panda had given her, but to no reply. Frustrated, Iris drinks the alcohol she had brought by herself before eventually stumbling upon a group of blond fellas with whom she parties before they help her find her way back to her bus. Iris questions whether Panda borrowed her Time Scrunchy.

2[]

Meanwhile, Panda has made his way to 1979 Paris with Iris' Time Scrunchy. He meets with a classy lady who, feeling neglected by her husband, invites him to her luxury apartment in the Marais for the evening.

3[]

In an attempt to meet with Panda, Iris sets her coordinates for Paris but ends up going off kilter within the Maelstrom. She finds herself within a Space city surrounded by a jungle of flesh-eating flaming plants. In the bar Iris witnesses a conference between space delegates including; one in a jumpsuit with covered in chocolate chip cookies, one that looked like a malevolent Christmas tree, and the Prime Minister of the Solar System. The meeting was apparently for a clandestine rendezvous with evil alien robots from another galaxy.

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Iris writes that earlier she had just spent her Christmas locked up in "the slammer" with someone who looked like the girl off Upstairs, Downstairs who mentions that "this one has been junked", then Iris had pulled out some sherry and the next thing she remembered that she had been running around like "they were in some silent movie", before passing out. She remembered waking up later as someone had just done a toast through the Fourth Wall, which Iris had subsequently escaped through. Ending her letter, Iris wishes that she and Panda could find themselves in the same Special Festive Episode next year.

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Iris is in a hospital on Holby Space City after being infected by a lurgy. She meets a "nice Professor" and PAND-R, a robotic companion of his own invention. To cure Iris, she, the Professor, and PAND-R clone themselves, shrink themselves, and go on a "Fantastic Journey all through [Iris'] insides". They find the source of the problem, a giant prawn, which Iris suspects she ate in a sandwich from a "dodgy motorway services". The giant prawn is defeated, but in order to expel the clones from Iris' body, they use colonics, much to Iris' displeasure.

The Professor has a new post on Earth, and he can't take PAND-R with him, so PAND-R becomes Iris companion.

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Iris Wildthyme opines that the Penultimate Question is always "Where's the bar?", and that the Ultimate Question is "What's yours, lovey?". She isn't at all looking forward to becoming the Jane Fonda Iris with whom Panda is travelling, who might have a icer figure than her but seems to be "a proper moaner".

Iris reports that for her part, she is "at the Earth's core". There, she has met some reptile people who are upset that the Ape Primitives have stolen their planet, as well as a "dashing old gentleman" who has a faint resemblance to Peter Cushing. Noting that MIAOW seem intent on committing genocide on the reptile people, she ends her letter there.

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An excited Panda promises to come right away via skates.

50[]

Iris writes Panda one last letter (despite their now being in the same place that says simply: "HURRAY FOR US!".

Characters[]

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Continuity[]

External links[]

  • From Wildthyme With Love at Snowbooks[1]
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