|The Happiness Patrol|
|Novelised as:||The Happiness Patrol|
|Main enemy:||Helen A, the Kandyman|
|Main setting:||Terra Alpha, 24th century|
|Number of episodes:||3|
|Premiere broadcast:||2 November - 16 November 1988|
|Doctor Who television stories|
|Remembrance of the Daleks||Silver Nemesis|
|Silver Nemesis||The Curse of Fenric|
|Behind the scenes video|
The Happiness Patrol was the second story in the twenty-fifth season of Doctor Who. It was intended (by the writers) to be a parody of Thatcherism, with Helen A representing Margaret Thatcher herself. [source needed]
The TARDIS arrives on the planet Terra Alpha, where the Seventh Doctor and Ace discover a society in which sadness is against the law - a law enforced zealously by the brightly uniformed Happiness Patrol. The planet is ruled by Helen A with the aid of her companion, Joseph C, and her carnivorous pet Stigorax, Fifi.
The penalty for those found guilty of unhappiness is death in a stream of molten candy prepared by Helen A's executioners, the robotic Kandy Man and his associate, Gilbert M. The time travellers help foment rebellion amongst the downtrodden population and the subterranean Pipe People — the planet's original inhabitants — and Helen A is overthrown.
Joseph C and Gilbert M escape in a shuttle, while the Kandy Man is destroyed and Fifi killed. Helen A finally realises the hard way that happiness is nothing without the contrast of sadness.
Having heard rumours of untoward happenings, the Seventh Doctor and Ace visit a human colony on the planet Terra Alpha, where they find unhappiness is an illegal act. In a perverse society ruled by the vicious and egotistical Helen A, the Happiness Patrol is a secret police force which hunts down killjoys and eliminates them. It also repaints the TARDIS pink as a colour more joyous than blue. The disappearances also worry Trevor Sigma, the official galactic censor. He is visiting Terra Alpha too, to discover where so many of the population have gone – 17% at the most recent count.
The Doctor and Ace have a brief incarceration to find out more about the society of Terra Alpha. They encounter unhappy guard Susan Q, who becomes a firm ally. They split up. The Doctor meets another visitor to the planet, Earl Sigma, a wandering harmonica player who stirs unrest by playing the blues. Earl and the Doctor venture to the Kandy Kitchen at the heart of the planet’s government. They find rebels drowned in fondant surprise, the favoured method of execution of the Kandy Man - a grotesque, sweet-based equivalent of a robot, created by Gilbert M, one of Helen A’s senior advisers.
The Doctor and Earl affect an escape by the Doctor causing the Kandy Man to accidently stick himself to the floor. They end up in the candy pipes below the colony, where dwell the native inhabitants of Terra Alpha, now known as Pipe People. They want to help overthrow the tyranny of Helen A. The Doctor returns to the surface and starts actively subverting the government system – supporting demonstrations in favour of unhappiness and stirring up the drones to revolt; preventing snipers from removing malcontents; and even challenging Helen A face-to-face to end the monstrosity of her government.
Meanwhile, Ace and Susan Q have been scheduled to appear in the late show at the Forum, where the penalty for non-entertainment is death. When Ace says she supports the Killjoys she is gagged until at the waiting zone. The Doctor and Earl rescue them. The four head to Helen A’s palace for a final showdown, while a revolution rages outside the palace walls. The first to be disposed of is Helen A’s pet Stigorax, Fifi, a rat-dog creature she had used to hunt down the Pipe People. Fifi is crushed in the pipes below the city. Next, the Pipe People destroy the Kandy Man in a flow of his own fondant surprise. Gilbert M and Joseph C, the consort of the leader, use the disorder to slip away. Helen A tries to flee too, but is challenged by the Doctor about the true nature of happiness, which can only be understood if counter-balanced by sadness. This is a notion she understands only when confronted with the remains of Fifi. The revolution is complete and the Doctor and Ace slip away – but only after the TARDIS has been repainted blue.
- The Doctor - Sylvester McCoy
- Ace - Sophie Aldred
- Helen A - Sheila Hancock
- Joseph C - Ronald Fraser
- Daisy K - Georgina Hale
- Priscilla P - Rachel Bell
- Gilbert M - Harold Innocent
- Trevor Sigma - John Normington
- Susan Q - Lesley Dunlop
- Earl Sigma - Richard D. Sharp
- Harold V - Tim Barker
- Silas P - Jonathan Burn
- Kandy Man - David John Pope
- Killjoy - Mary Healey
- Forum Doorman - Tim Scott
- David S - Steve Swinscoe
- Alex S - Mark Carroll
- Wences - Philip Neve
- Wulfric - Ryan Freedman
- Newscaster - Annie Hulley
- Assistant Floor Manager - Lynn Grant
- Costumes - Richard Croft
- Designer - John Asbridge
- Incidental Music - Dominic Glynn
- Make-Up - Dorka Nieradzik
- Producer - John Nathan-Turner
- Production Assistant - Jane Wellesley
- Production Associate - June Collins
- Script Editor - Andrew Cartmel
- Special Sounds - Dick Mills
- Studio Lighting - Don Babbage
- Studio Sound - Scott Talbott, Trevor Webster
- Theme Arrangement - Keff McCulloch
- Title Music - Ron Grainer
- Visual Effects - Perry Brahan
- The Doctor notes that Theta Sigma was his 'nickname at college'.
- The Doctor sings a verse of "As Time Goes By".
- The letter behind each person's name appears to be a kind of status marker. The leader has an A after her name, and her husband a C. The killjoy Harold V was called Harold F when he was the gag writer for Helen A, but was later degraded.
Foods and beverages
- Ace loves dinosaurs and hates lift music. She can't play an instrument, dance or sing.
- Ace wears a Charlton Athletic badge on her jacket.
- Helen A's delivery of the joke was critiqued by the Doctor as not being funny, and the timing was off.
- Terra Alpha is an Earth colony of at least three million people. The humans have driven the native inhabitants underground.
- Earth is known, but isn't the centre of power. That has shifted to the galactic centre, home of the Galactic Census Bureau.
- The Doctor last met a Stigorax in Birmingham in the 25th century. He describes them as 'Ruthless, intelligent predators.'
- This story had the working title The Crooked Smile. (This title also appeared as that of a local news-sheet read by some of the characters.)
- In the scenes set in the underground tunnels in Part Three, the Kandy Man has no metal brace around his mouth. This was added to the costume following these initial recordings to try to disguise the features of the actor inside.
- The howl of Helen A's pet Stigorax Fifi was actually the modulated sound of director Chris Clough's own voice.
- The character of Helen A was intended to satirise then-British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher. The character would say, "I like your initiative, your enterprise" while her secret police rounded up dissidents. In the story, the Doctor persuades "the drones", who toil in the factories and mines, to down tools and rise up in revolt, an echo of the miners’ strikes and printers' disputes during Thatcher's first two terms in office. 
- According to Sylvester McCoy in an interview for DWM 425, this story was originally planned to be filmed in black-and-white. McCoy said that he had only known this after it was filmed and said that he would've begged the production team to film in black and white, as he thought the sets were lacking.
- After the second episode of this story aired, the chairman and CEO of Bassett Foods wrote a letter of complaint to John Nathan-Turner, stating that the Kandy Man infringed on the copyright for his company's mascot, Bertie Bassett (a humanoid figure made of liquorice allsorts). A representative of the BBC Copyright Department replied, saying that there had been no violation of Bassett's copyright, but assuring the company that the Kandy Man would not return to the series.
- Rowan Williams, Archbishop of Canterbury, referred to this story in his 2011 Easter sermon, on the subject of happiness and joy.
- Steve Swinscoe and Mark Carroll are credited as Snipers on-screen but the Radio Times listing for Part 2 (available on The Happiness Patrol DVD) gives their character names as David S and Alex S.
- David John Pope (Kandy Man) is credited as 'Kandyman' in Radio Times.
- Tim Scott (Doorman) is credited as 'Forum Doorman' in Radio Times for Part 3.
- Part 1 - 5.3 million viewers
- Part 2 - 4.6 million viewers
- Part 3 - 5.3 million viewers
- Part Three of this story was originally intended to consist of animation rather than live action. (It wasn't.)
to be added
- The Doctor refers to Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart and his confrontation with a Triceratops and a Pterodactyl in the London Underground. (TV: Invasion of the Dinosaurs)
- The Doctor encounters the Kandy Man again in PROSE: The Trials of Tara.
- The TARDIS was also painted in TV: Paradise Towers and will be again in Aliens of London. In Timewyrm: Exodus, however, a man attempts to paint the TARDIS only to have the paint slide off completely.
- This story most likely takes place in the 25th century as Earth is considered a miserable place and overpopulation is a concern. (TV: Colony in Space) Similarly, many Earth colonies are considered terrible places in this century. (PROSE: Christmas on a Rational Planet)
Home video and audio releases
- This episode was released on DVD in the 'Ace Adventures' box set, along with Dragonfire, on 7th May 2012.
- Audio Commentary featuring Toby Hadoke, Sophie Aldred, Graeme Curry, Andrew Cartmel, Dominic Glynn and Chris Clough
- Happiness Will Prevail - Production documentary
- Deleted & Extended Scenes
- When Worlds Collide - Exploration of social and political commentary in Doctor Who
- Photo Gallery
- Isolated Score
- Production Subtitles
- Radio Times Listings
- Photo Gallery
- Coming Soon - Death to the Daleks (TV story)
- The Happiness Patrol at the BBC's official site
- The Happiness Patrol at BroaDWcast
- The Happiness Patrol at the Doctor Who Reference Guide
- The Happiness Patrol at Shannon Sullivan's A Brief History of Time (Travel)